Wednesday, February 10, 2010

FAIL.

Yesterday, after a particularly trying day as a parent I realized that despite all my good intentions of being the kind, supportive, loving, nurturing parent I failed…

After a morning of putting out small spats of bickering between the two older ones, dealing with the S word being used (stupid) when referring to a sibling (over and over and over again), having the little one attached to my leg all day, cleaning up poop off of the floor-in case you are wondering, we do NOT have a dog, and finding that dinner was going to be running late due to slacking on making sure that I had the recipe accessible, I found that I just couldn’t handle it anymore.

I was in the kitchen and the youngest member of my family that is out and about was crying and acting tired and hungry. I was in the midst of pouring something into a pot, she grabbed me and was crying, I burned myself and then proceeded to get angry with her.

FAIL.

I was thinking about it later as I sat there on the kitchen floor comforting her that it wasn’t her fault that she had napped early that day and that dinner was running late. How could I expect a one year old to be feeling chipper after only an hour long nap at 9:30 in the morning when it was 5:30 at night?

I felt ashamed of myself.

My needs had come before hers.

I realized that taking the few seconds to pick her up and give her a hug, to reassure her, maybe give her a little snack of some sort would have saved us all a lot of heartache.

So, that is my goal. From now on I am going to try and remember that I only have them this age for a short time and that life is quickly speeding by. I need to take the time. Forget about the house being perfect at all times, forget about the million things that I want to do and remember that there are more important things in life. Taking that minute to read the book, look at the drawing, play the part in the short make believe whatever, give the hug and kiss, comfort, etc… will be more important than the planned activities for the day.

So, here's hoping that today will be a better day.

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